As a young adult (actually a child in an adult body) I sprinted so hard trying to ‘make it happen’ whilst ‘faking it till I made it.’ I was running so fast I didn’t fathom that I was avoiding the hurts I dragged from pit to pillar to post. In the delusion of the rat-race, what I wanted was quickly replaced with what was available right now.
Particularly, this toxic trait of instant-gratification was evident in my relationship choices. As the lgbtq states, “Mr Right now instead of Mr Right.” I was so desperate to prove that I was lovable and loved that I cheapened myself by ignoring red flags and settled for the needle in the haystack that reasonably satisfying sex equated love.
Weeeeeeell, that didn’t work so good. 😂
When I became a Christian, Jesus needed to shift me from my inferiority complex that loved my neighbour more than myself. I had to learn to put myself on the spread-sheet of my life. This was hard because it meant suffering through the suffering I had avoided dealing with. When I saw that God wasn’t going to whisk away the pain and make me magically perfect, I eventually relented, and allowed The Holy Spirit to guide me into TRUTH.
I had to let go of the quick-fix, and begin learning to value myself as God values me.
It has been 20 years since I became a Believer and Follower of Jesus. It took 13 years to give up drug and alcohol addiction, and 14 years to love myself enough to quit a gay lifestyle because Jesus’ Love is of more value than the need to earn love through the neuro-programmed gay identity formed through childhood sexual abuse, labelling experienced from social settings telling me I was gay, and the bully tactics of stereotyping that lied to me saying that I wasn’t a man as per the world’s standard of being a man.
The process of sanctification- unlearning and relearning- although ongoing until we die or Jesus returns, is one of patience. God gives us just enough to chew on each step of HIS WAY as we grow, change, repeat from glory to glory.
Jentezen Franklin has a great short clip delving into the enabling grace of God (click link, ⬇️).
https://www.facebook.com/share/v/nXZDiBiMzGagMTSL/?mibextid=wFJQ5J
Genesis 41 screams at us as God opens our eyes to see that His Timing is always perfect, always necessary, and always right.
Contextually, now dead baker and restored cupbearer of Pharaoh forgot to mention Joseph, who interpreted their dreams, to Pharaoh. This was, in fact God’s doing, as God was preparing Joseph for something great- ruling Egypt second only to Pharaoh- which would save countless lives. AND later, would become instrumental in God’s Plan of saving humanity by leading slaves He Calls His Children out of Egypt who would birth Jesus THEE MESSIAH OF MANKIND.
But, falsely accused Joseph needed to practice patience in the forgotten pit of prison. Could you?
Genesis 41 vs 14 is the turning point for Joseph.
So why do we crave instant-gratification instead of learning to place value as God values?
Courtney E. Ackerman MA., reviewed by Jo Nash Ph.D, writes for ‘Positive Psychology’ giving us clear indicators of why we fall for instant gratification.
To quote: ‘“Psychologist Shahram Heshmat outlines 10 reasons why it is so difficult to sidestep this urge (2016):
- A desire to avoid delay: it’s uncomfortable to engage in self-denial, and all of our instincts are to seize any opportunity for pleasure as it comes.
- Uncertainty: generally, we are born with nearly infinite certainty and trust in others, but over time we learn to be less sure of the reliability of others and of our future; this uncertainty can cause us to value the less beneficial but certain-and-immediate over the more beneficial uncertain-and-long-term.
- Age: as you have likely already noted, younger people have a tendency to be more impulsive, while older people with more life experience are better able to delay and temper their urges.
- Imagination: choosing delayed gratification requires the ability to envision your desired future if you forego your current desire; if you cannot paint a vivid picture of your future, you have little motivation to plan for it.
- Cognitive capacity: higher intelligence is linked to a more forward-thinking perspective; those who are born with more innate intelligence have a tendency to see the benefits of delayed gratification and act in accordance.
- Poverty: even when we see the wisdom in delaying gratification, poverty can make the decision complicated and even more difficult; if you have an immediate, basic need that is begging to be met (e.g., food, shelter), it’s unlikely you will choose to forego that need in order to receive any future benefit.
- Impulsiveness: some of us are simply more impulsive or spontaneous than others, which makes delaying gratification that much more difficult; this trait is associated with problems like substance abuse and obesity.
- Emotion regulation: individual differences in emotion regulation also impact our tendency towards instant vs. delayed gratification; emotional distress makes us lean towards choices that will immediately improve our mood, and those who have developed emotion regulation problems are especially at risk.
- Mood: even those with healthy emotion regulation can be led astray by their current mood; we all experience bad moods, boredom, and impatience—all of which serve to make immediate desires that much more seductive.
- Anticipation: finally, the experience of anticipation can influence our decisions to delay gratification or seek it immediately in either direction; humans generally like to anticipate positive things and dislike the anticipation of negative things, which can lead to decisions to put things off or to engage in them as quickly as possible to seek pleasure or avoid discomfort.”’ – https://positivepsychology.com/instant-gratification/
What areas of the above list are weak areas for you that allow you to be triggered into impulsive and compulsive behaviours?
David Guzik, ‘Enduring Word’ explains how to value the waiting periods of God’s Work in our lives. It helps us to value God’s Way when we see WHY God uses waiting on Him in our lives.
GOD IS TRANSFORMING US INTO THE IMAGE OF JESUS.
As we look at this startling reality check, all our ‘me, myself, and I’ mentality fades into the dust it came from. There is nothing greater than being made into the likeness of THEE ONLY ONE WHO SAVES THROUGH WHICH WE GAIN ACCESS TO OUR FATHER.
In humility, we should fall to our knees asking our Father/Jesus/Holy Spirit, “Please forgive me for devaluing You so much that I made The Way about me instead of You. AMEN.”
A great clip putting us into the RIGHT perspective again, ⬇️.
https://www.facebook.com/share/r/3KtXEUoaZNs7xfed/?mibextid=UalRPS
God is more than able, willingly gives us enabling grace, immeasurably patient, and is THE WAY to be saved. The question is why we value it so little?
JESUS LOVES YOU, please come home.
#Hayibo 